One Morning In The Office

Shamelessly carried over from a Goodreads forum but wanted a bit more visibility.

https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/18458920-one-morning-in-the-office—a-satire

Ring ring ring
"Please press 1 for current orders, two for new orders three for accounts and four for any other reason"
"Rex, is this a new order, I thought we tried to order this last week."
"The web site crashed."
"I better select two then."
Twenty minutes later....
"Customer Service, Blanche speaking how can I help you today we have special offers on roofing and nails for details please see..."
Five minutes later
"How can I help?"
"I'd like to order some bricks"
"No problem, Sir, we can do that or you can try on-line"
"I couldn't get the site to accept my order."
"Sorry about that Sir, I just need to go through a few details."
"Well I don't have much time."
"It won't take long. Have you ordered from us before."
"No, I don't think so."
"All our bricks are baked in America and conform to EPA standards."
"Good to see American jobs for American people for America let's make it great again."
"Quite. What are the bricks for?"
"A wall."
"Is that a supporting wall, a building wall or a garden wall?"
"There's a difference?"
"Oh yes they have different properties a building wall might be external facing or interior"
"I think it's closest to a garden wall a barrier really."
"I see, well we have some basic standard bricks they are 3 and 5/8 by 2 and 1/4 by 8 inches."
"Yeah I saw that on the web site."
"So how high is your wall going to be?"
"Twenty feet."
"Wow, that's a big garden wall."
"Yep, gonna keep them bad dudes out."
"Are you in a high crime area? Can I interest you in our razor wire or intrusion detection systems."
"Just the bricks for now."
"So you'll need at least 120 rows depending on foundations."
"Foundations?"
"Yes you'll need to dig down to make sure the wall has solid foundations. You can do that with concrete. It also prevents varmints digging under the wall."
"People can tunnel under?"
"Normally its raccoons or other pests."
"What about Mexicans?"
"Sir, no racist profiling please or I'll have to call my supervisor. A wall with good foundations can prevent some tunneling but how deep do you want to go?"
 Mumbled "Do it with mines or concrete."
"I think concrete would be a good idea. We can supply that as well."
"Stick to the bricks."
"So how long is your wall going to be?"
"1,900."
"Wow that is big. So we have 1900 feet which is 2850 bricks by 120 high which is 342,000 which is 684 pallets of 500 call it 700 for spares.
"Err..."
"Mr President..."
"Not now Rex."
"We discount orders over 50 pallets so I make that 700 at $200 bucks that would be $140,000 that would make my day Sir if you go ahead. I might be able to get an extra 5% off or free delivery. What's the delivery address?
"Er lets start in San Diego."
"OK do you have a zip?"
"Mr President it's 1900 miles not feet?"
"What did you say Rex?"
"Miles Sir not 1,900 feet."
"Oh, sorry Ma'am I got the length wrong it's 1900 miles."
"No problem I'll just stick that in the systems..."
Very long pause
"That's 15,048,000 bricks long by 120 high that's.."
"A lot."
"1,805,760,000 er I think you may be pulling my leg."
"No I'm serious I promised to build it and I'm going to."
"Sir the entire US Brick production last year was only about 2 billion bricks"
"Is that not enough? I always get confused between billions and millions." 
"That explains the tax returns."
"Shut up Rex."

 

 

 

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Where Did 4 Years Go?

It’s 4 years today since my first book came out.

Cover Title 300Hard to understand where the time has gone.  Of course a lot has happened since then. More books written, some have even sold! The original An Agent’s Demise was followed by two sequels and a combined trilogy. Yet my writing went in other directions. The excitement of hitting lofty heights of number 1 in the charts for a day with Demise has not been repeated.

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I have had (and still have one) two different day jobs since then.

Four years ago my children were still students now they are both post degree and working.

If someone knows where the time went please let me know – I think it’s with the odd socks and pens in my home. Perhaps it’s just the extra wrinkles on my face. Not a good trade.

Now I need Book 10 to get finished. The nine current ones are listed below. You never know someone might want to read one!

The World of Fives
Intervention
The Demise Trilogy
An Agent’s Demise
An Agent’s Rise
An Agent’s Prize
To The Survivors
The Persuasive Man
Landscape

The Demise Trilogy

Out today on Kindle

Demise Trilogy Cover

The Complete Demise Trilogy
This is a complex thriller based on the lead up to and aftermath of the second Iraq war. A conspiracy to cover up the associated activities of parts of the intelligence services. Now available as a complete trilogy.

An Agent’s Demise
Intelligence analysts and agents have gone missing, some may have been killed. The press and the police suspect there is a serial killer on the loose. John Slater was near the latest victim, he is evasive, appears to have no history, and he might be the killer. The second Iraq war and the intelligence network may link the victims and so The Metropolitan Police’s Special Branch investigates, with the help or hindrance of the Intelligence Agencies. The mistakes made in creating the dossiers used to support going to war are supposed to stay buried on both sides of the Atlantic, but still a killer strikes and is everybody telling the truth?

An Agent’s Rise
The Demise operation was shut down the killer allowed to disappear. But the conspirators have not all been caught and the efforts of MI6 and the CIA to cover up the dirty deeds of the security services only results in more deaths and destruction. Slater returns to tidy up, but how can he reconcile his new life with what he is asked to do?

What happens to Jess and Michael? Will the newly promoted Detective Chief Inspector Hooper really allow the suspected killer to go free?

Can the authorities continue to cover up the plot to alter the Iraqi Dossiers on both sides of the Atlantic?

Can the killer stop killing?

An Agent’s Prize
The conspiracy is over, the mistakes and cover up are hidden and buried for good. Both sides of the Atlantic can concentrate on the threats from Islamic Terrorism. That is what they all hope. They want to enlist a hidden black asset in the chase, but there are risks to that approach.

Meanwhile the FBI is still investigating what really happened. Is the conspiracy really over?

Al Qaeda plan new atrocities and MI6 with Homeland Security will try to stop them.

The newlywed Michael Johnson can help but his wife is still recovering from her injuries and she is suspicious of her husband and the authorities. From the streets of San Francisco to the suburban towns of England the terrorists are plotting an outrage.

Intervention – The Observer Series Part 2

Part Two of the Observer Series will launch on 30th January on Kindle – It is available for pre-order now:

Amazon.co.uk  or Amazon.com also other Amazon sites worldwideIntervention cover

The continuing story of Cathy Rodriguez – a Senior Observer in the Interplanetary Geographic Service. The story follows on from Part One The World of Fives

Cathy is recalled from her Observer duties as she is asked to establish first contact with a new life form. Meanwhile the Conspiracy to prevent humans changing their non-Intervention policy continues to try and kill her. Together with Marta De Jaste, a Senior Investigator, and Tony Briggs her former jailer and security officer, they travel to the chosen planet.

On the planet Tullymeade, Karloon Niesta, a disgraced scientific observer, detects a strange anomaly. A discovery that will change his planet forever.

In deep space two groups of survivors try and recover from their battle in orbit above the planet Freevur

Intervention – Part Two of The Observer Series

A taster of the story to come – Adapted from the records of The Interplanetary Geographic Service

<<Comms Transmission SGRINC67564 − 3680-04-19-1402:16.23 burst Key XGDES2056Blowfish#@GEOSURVEYS & XGDES2056Blowfish#@COLSERV
Data Load: 1.2Tb compressed.
Survey inspection methodology: x25-theta.
Mission: 28427335f: Report 225: Comment: Mission Complete!
Reporting Officer: SupGenCol/GenGeo Rodriguez in Command Survey Ship Theta-Carmalite. In command still.
Sector: Tesla 281 Segment X-ray 132 sub-segment one. There aren’t any other sub-segments
Mission Objectives: Observe, probably the dullest mission I have ever been on apart from the collision with the asteroid/mini planet/moon whatever it was. Oh, and the rest of the millions of collisions, explosions, random debris, etc.
Earth Distance: 326,853LY. A very long way from Earth – never been this far out before.
Mission Date: 3680-04-19. Time to head in.
Population: Report 226: Comment: None, still none and will still be none in a billion years
Physiology: Report 227: Comment: Ditto
Secondary Population: Report 228: Comment: None
Language: Report 229: Comment: None, but mine is getting worse – again
Sun – System Planets: Report 230: Comment: New planetary system forming in this arm as expected with high density of Helium and Hydrogen particles. Explosive elements appear to have been caused by clash of paths of two L type gas giants, hence causing what appeared to be a super nova. Of course that was fifteen Earth years ago based on light speed explosion detection from nearest Bot. Data shows possibility of L type resulting from the mess but the jury is still out. Will require full GeoServ analysis to confirm but we’d need another half billion years before finding out for sure.
Any planets, that might have been in the original system of the star are long gone. Radiation levels are exceptionally high and there is a lot of physical debris preventing closer approach. Probes in place but several have been lost to high velocity impact. Theta-Carmalite received minor damage before withdrawing further out. Okay it was a bit more than minor damage but we’re fixing up nicely.

Situation unstable so please warn my followers or chasers of the dangers and not to get too close.

Ship Status: Report 230: Comment: Damage repaired. Probe stocks at 30% of total. Crew bored, you told me I would be.
Recommendations: Time to head in, I need a glass of real wine from CarpaMax.
Comms Transmission SGRINC67564 − 3680-04-19-1402:16.23 burst Key XGDES2056Blowfish#@GEOSURVEYS & XGDES2056Blowfish#@COLSERV>>
<<Comms Transmission SGRINC67564 − 3680-04-19-1403:38:28 burst Key XGDES2056Blowfish#@GEOSURVEYS & XGDES2056Blowfish#@COLSERV
Reporting Officer: DirFus/IntSupDir Constantine Del Quiller. Acknowledged Mission Complete, Proceed CarpaMax, I shall see you there!
Comms Transmission SGRINC67564 − 3680-04-19-1403:38:28 burst Key XGDES2056Blowfish#@GEOSURVEYS & XGDES2056Blowfish#@COLSERV>>

The Writer’s Craft

I thought I would take a break from actual writing to show you some of the tools I use to put the story together. As an example I am using Intervention the second part of The Observer Series. Whether what I display makes it into the final cut we will have to see. I am over 50,000 words into the story.

The main tool I use is Scrivener, the chapter manuscript is in the centre of the screen with the list of proposed chapter headings, characters and places/scenes on the left. All my writing is done here and the formatting for eBooks and Paperbacks using Scrivener’s Compile feature.

Screen Shot 2015-05-02 at 10.21.39

In the continuing absence of an iPad version for Scrivener, I use Index Card when I am away from my desktop Mac. It does link with Scrivener but it s not the same.

MainCorkboardStackCount-300x400

The next tool I use is to keep my timeline straight. This is Aeon Timeline which integrates with Scrivener. This one shows a couple of Arcs (chapters or scenes) with events and then cross linked to characters, scenes etc. I do not need this for all my stories but when it gets complicated i.e. with travel, synchronous events, etc.  it keeps things organised

Screen Shot 2015-05-02 at 10.21.20

Next comes the ever present Excel. Nothing very clever here, apart from all the ratios and calculations to convert Earth measurements and time into my alien settings. Of course I do not need this for every story but I find it essential in my SciFi. I like to think that my stories could work if you ignore the faster than light etc elements. Before I used Scrivener and Aeon, I also used it for character lists and timelines i.e. calculating how old people are and what day of the week it was/will be.

Screen Shot 2015-05-02 at 10.22.03

Finally, there is, of course, research. In the screen shot below, from a Physics site, (http://www.physicsclassroom.com/class/circles/Lesson-3/The-Value-of-g), I was checking up on how G is calculated, then using the formula in Excel to calculate for my other planets. Research varies considerably from Google Maps for other stories to University research papers that I read when writing To The Survivors about how viruses spread.

Screen Shot 2015-05-02 at 10.23.46

I know that many writers use other tools from simple text editors to complex design systems for covers. I use PaintShop Pro for that. One of my last Windows only tools. Keep trying to learn others but have not found a layered system one (that can import my old ones), as easy to use – I just wish there was a Mac version – come on Corel anyone would think Macs were new!

I have also used  a CAD program for laying out physical buildings. I have also used mind- mapping software – that was in An Agent’s Rise and I actually created the mind map I had the characters do.

New Book Description For Landscape

Aside

There is a new book description for Landscape

She is a PA who dreams of running her own art gallery. He is an IT technician gambling away everything he wants. They meet and fall in love. Their relationship is threatened by endless bets even whilst they share their love of paintings.

Years later some dreams are fulfilled others are dashed. Will the former lovers meet again?

Progress Update

I have not been updating all the sub-pages of this site as frequently as I would like. Still I’ll have some time soon to devote to writing and the supporting effort.

On that theme I have joined Readers In The Know as another way of trying to reach more readers, especially when I have offers for books going like the ongoing Smashwords deals I have although in this case the primary links are to Amazon.

To the point of the blog – updates to current writing progress:

An Agent’s Prize – the third book in what I’m calling the Demise series – after a long stall this has finally got going again. I have had to sort out the plot’s timeline to make it work and drop a major scene idea which was forcing to many other scenes.

Intervention – Another stalled process that has got going again. This is the second part of The Observer Series. I was making it too complex, so some cutting and altering needed to be done before progress could be made. That revision has mostly been done and further chapters added

Collection One – Not far off finishing, but in the put away and think about it for a while. Not happy with the proposed cover nor the title. Actually, not totally convinced by a couple of the stories.

Revolt – No progress, this may be put away for a while

To The Survivors – The Sequel – Has been started but I have a conflict in where it starts with several alternate ideas and three opening chapters. The biggest problem has always remained, where does it go and from when, till when? The original spans twenty years or more.

Others

There are other snippets and starts but nothing definite. For those of you who have heard snippets from me – I can’t say when or how these will evolve.

Enough blogging – there is lots of writing to do as well as promoting existing works, setting pricing, and not checking sales